Mutations

"Neighbours have suggested the couple keep the piglet to see how it looks as it matures."

Nothing more reprehensible than a pig-fucking monkey.

No, sir. Not by a mile.

Leave Those Kids Alone

The original video for "Another Brick in the Wall".


Alan Parker's movie freaked me the hell out as a kid.

Paper Planes

Some, Some, Some I, Some I murder...
Some I, Some I let go...


The M.I.A. song they're using in the trailers for PINEAPPLE EXPRESS is way better than the actual Huey Lewis theme song the movie uses.

Hey, I've got the greatest nostalgia for The News. But this had to be said.

David Pogue Sucks

I kinda don't like NYT tech columnist David Pogue.

This is the impression I get from watching his tv series "It's All Geek To Me". A show that seems catered to grandparents who don't know how to change the channels on their new televisions.

But don't worry because David Pogue is there with his self-satisfied, shit-eating grin to tell you the proper way to make a home-movie with your new camcorder, how to put an album on your new iPod, and how to brush your fucking teeth, you fucking nincompoop.

That said, I kinda agree with his appraisal of the general nastiness of sites that allow comments.

From his own post:

"The Internet is making it easier to attack, not to embrace."

His theories, like his show, are a bit obvious.

But the ability to add a comment to an online story is what really separates the internet from print. You get to interact. Someone might have spent a good long while writing an article, but all you need to do is type "u suck" to contribute to it. It's anonymous and cathartic for some people—not just children.

It breeds a certain level of sarcasm/nastiness. But it keeps people coming back.

(And I've disabled comments here because I just don't want to deal with it!)

I Don't Get It

The Mormon made me create these two animated gifs.

Why?

And who's "The Mormon"?

Oh, and -- why??

I'm not sure.

Maybe we'll all find the answers soon enough. (Most certainly too late.)

One Dead Gremlin

Jesus Christ, do I love GREMLINS.

Not the self-deprecating, apologetic parody of "Gremlins 2".

The perfect kiddie horror movie, about the dangers of adorable pets.

Eh Joe

Although it lasts just half an hour, this staging of a Beckett piece originally written for television is one of the most wholly satisfying nights I’ve spent at the theater this year. Remarkably, Mr. Neeson draws a transfixing portrait of a man on the edge of emotional collapse without speaking a single word.

Samuel Beckett's "Eh Joe" is the reason I love theater. The reason I love the infinite possibilities of theater. And I haven't even seen the fucking show.

I know I've been quiet on this—on any real news lately—but I mean to get back to theater. I've got a lot of short-term and long-term goals to tend to... but there is a lot I want to accomplish in both theater and film before my mysterious, untimely death.

The Adventures Of Mutilator: Hero of the Wasteland

In case you missed it back in 1990, behold Eric Fogel's masterful MUTILATOR:

Bubblegum Rock

I'm a much bigger fan of The Scorpions's album covers than their actual music.

(That is all for today—thanks for stopping by!)

Rorschach Test

Wearing the inkblot-like mask he considers his true face, Rorschach has continued his one-man battle against crime long after superheroes became both detested and illegal. Rorschach’s actions and journal writings display a belief in moral absolutism and objectivism, where good and evil are clearly defined and evil must be violently punished. He has alienated himself from the rest of society to achieve these aims. Rorschach is described by Alan Moore as an extremely right-wing character.

The Mystic Knights of the Oingo Boingo

Was there ever a theater troupe/band stranger than Oingo Boingo?

Their biggest claim to fame (beyond composing the title theme to John Hughes's seminal WEIRD SCIENCE) may be the launching of Danny Elfman as a major film composer, but they had a fascinating journey. Which included a feature musical called THE FORBIDDEN ZONE that is pretty out there.

Check out this clip of them on the original GONG SHOW in 1976.

(Note Buddy Hackett's wince-worthy comment.)

Underachievement

This is the sort of article I need.

I don't want to read about the great things I'm not doing.

I want to read about the horrible things I'm not doing.

Thank you, The Onion.

Cautionary Tale

"The Boondock Saints is a movie for people who think Tarantino is too cerebral."

A look at the infamous Troy Duffy's THE BOONDOCK SAINTS.

Del Toro Diaries

I love Guillermo del Toro.

Hellboy 2 has some awesome creations in it. It's a creature feature. It is crammed with remarkable flourishes of imagination.

View/hear:

the Del Toro Diary

We All Shine On

Another one for the "In Case You Missed It" file...

Channel 4's meticulous recreation of THE SHINING set.

(Viddy the video and read the accompanying article.)

The Kubrick Archive

I feel a little like Shelley Duvall in The Shining, chancing upon her husband's novel and finding it is comprised entirely of the line "All Work And No Play Makes Jack A Dull Boy" typed over and over again. John Baxter wrote, in his unauthorised biography of Kubrick, "Most people attributed the purchase of Childwick to Kubrick's passion for privacy, and drew parallels with Jack Torrance in The Shining."

I am a massive Kubrick fan. He was one of my heroes.

There are a lot of non-fans of his work. People who think of his fans as part of some mindless cult who just think it's cool to like Kubrick. These people get pretty tiresome.

The man created a body of work that I just find endlessly fascinating.

Even his final film, the vehemently derided Eyes Wide Shut, is just so surreal and interesting to me. I've got problems with it but there is some remarkable work in there.

Here's a great article called "Citizen Kubrick".

"Two years after his death, Jon Ronson was invited to the Kubrick estate and let loose among the fabled archive..."

Radiohead Cover

Big Ideas (don't get any) from James Houston on Vimeo.
"I grouped together a collection of old redundant hardware, and placed them in a situation where they're trying their best to do something that they're not exactly designed to do, and not quite getting there."

Sinclair ZX Spectrum - Guitars (rhythm & lead)
Epson LX-81 Dot Matrix Printer - Drums
HP Scanjet 3c - Bass Guitar
Hard Drive array - Act as a collection of bad speakers - Vocals & FX

Full description HERE.

Alfred Hitchcock's Holocaust Documentary

Have you all seen Hitchcock's Holocaust Documentary? Here it is.

Same Old Story

Forgive me for being morbidly fascinated by these modern tales of true horror, but I can't help it:

"The victims testified that they were beaten with brooms and umbrellas, slashed with knives, and forced to climb stairs and take freezing showers as punishment. One victim was forced to eat dozens of chili peppers against her will, and then was forced to eat her own vomit when she couldn't keep the peppers down, prosecutors said."

The NY Times article.

Metal Gear Solid 4

Apologies to all the non-gamers.

Metal Gear Solid 4 is a game released exclusively for the PS3 which has won PERFECT 10 REVIEWS.

I'm all about popularity contests. But I've played MGS4 and that emperor's buck nekkid.

Someone else nails it here:


I don't mean to summarily disrespect Kojima and what's he's created. There are some brilliant flares in the game. This SLATE article calls him the videogame world's equivalent of Stanley Kubrick.

But videogames are NOT movies.

Movies should tell a story through showing you.

Videogames should tell a story through your INTERACTION with them.

Convoluted narrative aside, this is the fundamental way that MGS4 screws up.

Have You Found Her

Have You Found Her from Milk Products on Vimeo.

A Bleaker Future

I pray the country isn't so racist that THIS guy gets elected.

Check out The Real McCain.

The Heart Wants What it Wants

Lenore & Brutus
"I couldn't fathom Lenore's attraction: She'd been spayed a few months earlier. And Brutus' behavior was even more incomprehensible. Sheep are flocking animals, which is why dogs can move them in and out of a pasture or a pen. They don't go off on their own and form relationships with other species; they barely seem to differentiate among their fellow sheep..."

Next stop: BEDLAM...

Systematic Degradation

"What an absolute mess."

Check out the full text from one of Bill Gates's old emails.

Note this was from 2003, years before the genuine and enduring debacle of Vista.

The cult of Mac-zombies still makes my skin crawl. Third party candidate?

Avenge Me!

RED DAWN:

"When Jed's small Midwestern town is invaded by the combined forces of the Cuban and Russian armies, it's up to Jed to lead a small group of teenagers up into the mountains to hide like little bitches."

WOLVERINES!

Skid Rose

In case you missed it, Sebastian Bach, ladies and germs:

When we were first hanging out in 2006, we were just standing around a bunch of people. I go, ‘Axl, do you think you might get the record out? It would be a great time, now that we’re on tour and everything.’ He goes, ‘Oh. Great! Everybody! Sebastian has a great idea here, man. Guess what? Sebastian, should I put out a record? Maybe it would be a good idea for me to put out a fucking record! Hey everybody, listen to this! I never thought of that! That never came to me! Oh, great idea dude.’

Last Words

"I'll be in Hell before you start breakfast!"

Cracked's 11 Most Badass Last Words Ever

Plumpy Nut

What is PlumpyNut?

According the Anderson Cooper, it's the miracle food of the future...

Eulogy Roundup

Of course, George Carlin and Stan Winston have got posses.

In case you missed these:

Jerry Seinfeld on Carlin.

Steven Spielberg on Winston.