Why Not Smile?

You've been so sad...
It makes me worry...
Why not smile...?
You've been sad for a while...
- R.E.M.

Last night, it all came together. Opening night performance, even rough around the edges, it came together. The play came through. People responded. Like they didn't know what hit them. You could feel the surprise rippling through the audience. They had expectations coming in and they were not prepared...

I've been in the thick of the process of this production -- I've been involved with a lot of (smaller) shows before this -- but I still can't believe how this show arrived where it did last night.

I know it sounds like a cliché to say that this is a play I'd given up on before it got into this festival, but it's true. I'm still bitter about the reception of the reading I mounted of it ~2.5 years ago. I directed that reading myself because, at the time, I didn't know anyone else that I trusted enough to direct it. People dismissed the play based on that reading. I started to lose faith in the play based on that reading. But this production feels like more of a vindication because of how poorly that reading went.

It pays to have a brilliant creative team behind you. I've been DIY for too long.

I'm...... happy. I write that hesitatingly because if absolutely nothing changes for me after the run of this show, I will be very disappointed. Before SPF, I suffered the worst two years of my life. And I'll probably carry the scars of those two years with me for the rest of my days. But after everything I've been through, and after everything I've worked for, I think I deserve something good to happen in my life... it can't all be one horrible thing after another -- why would you keep reading...?